Ineffable stranger


‘Chai(tea)??’ came a text on my mobile.

‘Will reach canteen directly in 5’, I replied.

No sooner did I reach canteen than my eyes started looking for that beauty. She wasn’t there that day. As always I and my friend Ravi ordered special chai.

I purposely sat facing the road which she takes for canteen so that I can gaze her for long and that sight…of those kajal-clad innocent eyes gives me ‘eyegasm’. Never ever in my life earlier did I observe a girl so minutely. Within few minutes, I saw her coming towards canteen, all alone today. That scene of watching her walk from blur to clarity is something worth capturing and most precious. My heart slowly started showing colours then, beating faster than never.

She reached canteen, gave me that truehearted and much awaited look. Her seraphic look benumbs me so much that I couldn’t even give her a smile. Then I secretly follow her facial expressions and expressive eyes. Well…this lasts for 15 minutes and then I go back to my normal, draggy life longing to see her again!!

This happens almost every time I see her in canteen. And I’ve visited canteen so many times, just to catch a glimpse of her that I can even draw a probability distribution curve of her canteen visits!!

But these days are different. Even my mornings are dark. I haven’t seen her in moons. Not even anywhere in college. I visit canteen thrice a day just to watch those beautiful pair of eyes, but no luck. Ergodic and scary thoughts going inside my mind daunt me. ‘What if she met with an accident??’ ‘What if she left college?? What if she’s having viral??’ And the worst of all, ‘’What if she stopped visiting canteen ‘cause of me??’

As luck would have it I saw her in canteen few days later. But this time she had reached before me. I made up my mind, this time I will pass a nonchalant smile. I gazed at the damsel appreciating her beauty. She didn’t look back. No response. Benighted me, dropped a cup of tea so that she would respond at least to the sound of shattering. Still, no reaction. I hurried and went off to hostel with my friend.

Contemplating about what was going on in my life since few weeks, I calmly decided to give it a grave thought. But I was unable to becalm myself. Anxious.

The world seems so dark as if seasonal affective disorder has come over me. She is as good as a stranger to me. I don’t know her name. I don’t know where on earth she lives. I don’t know what language she speaks, what food she eats.

I feel like going straight unto her, lift her chin and say,

Nazar uthao zara tum to qainaat chale,

Hai intizaar ki aankho se koi baat chale,

Tumhari marzi bina waqt bhi apahiz hai,

Na din khisakta hai aage, na aage raat chale” (Gulzar saab)

(Lift your eyes so that a world can come into being,

I’m waiting for conversation to spark between our eyes,

Without your consent even time is handicapped,

Neither the day ascends nor the night descends)

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38 comments

  1. Personal Concerns · January 30, 2012

    what a beautiful post!

    and yes i do agree with the meaning the term eyegasm entails!

  2. alphaqsecc · January 30, 2012

    Thanks amit…glad you got the term.

  3. rajivgupta003 · January 30, 2012

    yar, kaun hai wo ??

  4. alphaqsecc · January 30, 2012

    haha…bhai fiction hai 😉

  5. Gaurav Kumar · January 30, 2012

    Expressing a plethora of emotions in just a few words …only a person who has had first hand experience of Love could do that.Correct na? 🙂
    Love is such a beauty only the privileged ones experience.

    • alphaqsecc · January 30, 2012

      Thanks a lot bro….first hand experience of ‘love’…you see, love is a noun & keeps on changing 😉

  6. Gaurav Kumar · January 30, 2012

    For Eyes… I’d say yes Love is indeed a noun.The Eyes can differentiate whenever the frame changes.
    But your Heart stays as it is…beating the same rhythms,rippling down your spine the same emotions every-time you fall in Love.

  7. 12kilroy · January 31, 2012

    Well done. I also love the use of the term ‘eyegasm’

    • alphaqsecc · January 31, 2012

      Thanks a lot Kilroy…keep reading 🙂

  8. Sanah · January 31, 2012

    Somethings are better left unsaid.
    It’s fictional and yet you so clearly describe every emotion surging through his head.
    It’s superb, Abhijit.
    Keep it up. 🙂

  9. alphaqsecc · January 31, 2012

    Yeah, even the protagonist feels so….
    But I think i’d have done a lot better on the waiting part..
    Thanks a ton 🙂 😀

  10. vikas pathak · January 31, 2012

    chalte chalte raah mein yun hi rasta mud jata hai
    anjaane mein,anjaane se rishta jud jata hai

    beautiful and straight-out-of-heart tale.keep writing 🙂

  11. alphaqsecc · January 31, 2012

    Thanks bhai for helping me out with the translation of Gulzar saab!!
    And now your ‘keep writing’ motivates me further 🙂 😀

  12. siddesh · February 7, 2012

    Chetan Bhagat 2;)

    • alphaqsecc · February 8, 2012

      Hehe…Thanks..but I’m not that great !

      • Kam · March 8, 2012

        You are not ‘just that great’. Better I think.

  13. shubroto · February 8, 2012

    rily a nice composition…hope she 2 reads dis…;)
    n ya EYEGASM…must hve been coined by a vnitian….:P

    • alphaqsecc · February 8, 2012

      Thanks Pani 🙂
      I so pray to GOD that she reads this 😉
      But there’s no way she’s reading this…I seriously don’t know who she is 😦

  14. Soham Bhalerao · February 8, 2012

    I m interested in that probability distribution curve that you managed to plot..

  15. TR · February 15, 2012

    bhai laga rah…ek na ek din pakka aankhen milengi 😉

  16. Manshul Arora · February 15, 2012

    And just in 5 min , you reminded me about all the love stories i had in my college lyf.. Great Time that wa.. Aah ..
    Thx 🙂

    • alphaqsecc · February 15, 2012

      Crushes, Lust and love : these very much sums up every engineer’s college life 😉

  17. RMS · February 16, 2012

    good use of words 🙂
    depicts the most confusing phase of adolescence, well… even further.

  18. Kam · March 8, 2012

    All those spiritual beings begin with love. So be it. I like this one.

    • alphaqsecc · March 8, 2012

      Thanks a lot Kam…you’re very inspiring 🙂

  19. Anuradha · March 10, 2012

    Beautifully written… A lot can happen over chai haan!

    • alphaqsecc · March 10, 2012

      Hehe…Thanks Anuradha 🙂 Certainly, a lot can happen !!

  20. buzzzzzz · March 10, 2012

    love ur blog template…….

  21. cheerfultornado · March 11, 2012

    Beautifully crafted !! Is this fiction(doesn’t look so to me) ?

    • alphaqsecc · March 11, 2012

      Hehe…your judgement is partially correct…its ficto-real 😉 🙂

  22. Piyush Kaushal · March 12, 2012

    Fiction is just a fictitious term, thoughts originate from the day-2-day encounters 🙂 a good read it was for sure!

    Cheers!
    Indigenou

    • alphaqsecc · March 12, 2012

      Selfsame view on fiction…thank you 🙂 keep reading 🙂

  23. delhizen · March 18, 2012

    College canteen romance!! well written story especially the verse.

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